dsbatten on Nostr: A short personal story about the human potential (Nostr only) Back when legwarmers ...
A short personal story about the human potential (Nostr only)
Back when legwarmers were fashionable, Sony Walkmans were new, and “Chariots of Fire” was top of the charts, I was a nervous twelve year old who dreaded school. I didn’t dread all of school, just one part that happened once a month, without fail and without escape.
As part of the uncommonly high emphasis our school placed on ‘oral language’ we had to prepare and recite a universally loathed three-minute speech to the class.
I reviled this day with all my thumping heart, stammering lips and clammy palms. Contracting a “rare illness” did not work - we simply had to do it upon our return; failing to rehearse didn't work – we were made to do it unprepared.
After three woeful speeches, something strange happened. In recounting it to other people today, it feels about as sophisticated as Thomas the Tank Engine achieving his dreams by pumping out “I know I can” – but this is the way it happened, so this is the way I’ll tell it.
Something inside me said, “The only reason you speak badly is because you fear speaking badly. But the reverse is also true. If you expect to speak well – you will.”
Spurred on by this mysterious message, for the next three days, I practiced sounding courageous with my unbroken voice, and practiced looking confident in front of my mum’s full-length mirror until I was out of time.
Speech day arrived.
I opened my mouth, made a joke and waited for the groans. A few people laughed. I was staggered. I’d never told a joke that someone had laughed at before in my life. My confidence grew.
Was my strategy working? Spontaneously, my voice started incorporating what I’d practiced. I noticed the audience smiling and listening attentively. That was a new experience!
This became like a virtuous upward spiral. Every time I noticed the connection with the audience deepen, my confidence in turn would go up, till by the end, the teacher could not believe that I was the same timid 11-year old.
One year later, despite overwhelming shyness, I had just spoken in front of 500 of my peers. In a state of post-speech calm, I heard with disbelief the words “Winner of the speech competition: Daniel Batten!”
The sequence of strategies I practiced back in 1982, however formative, had worked.
Nothing much had changed on the outside. I didn't have any more skills as a speaker. I hadn't learnt delivery. I hadn't learnt how to structure a compelling talk. That stuff is all the UI, important, but not as important as optimizing the underlying code. What I'd done all those years ago was to change a bit of internal coding architecture, so that I could operate without constraints.
Decades later, this would inform how I coached leaders, CEOs and founders of technology companies, and how I coached myself. Yes, we do a bit of work on the UI. But the most effective and immediate work is done refactoring our inner algorithms.
~~~
Question:
Where have you assumed you have a fixed potential based on previous experiences, whereas a small internal tweak in your internal coding (a tweak to a mindset, pattern of belief or intention for example) could allow you to experience new experiences?
Back when legwarmers were fashionable, Sony Walkmans were new, and “Chariots of Fire” was top of the charts, I was a nervous twelve year old who dreaded school. I didn’t dread all of school, just one part that happened once a month, without fail and without escape.
As part of the uncommonly high emphasis our school placed on ‘oral language’ we had to prepare and recite a universally loathed three-minute speech to the class.
I reviled this day with all my thumping heart, stammering lips and clammy palms. Contracting a “rare illness” did not work - we simply had to do it upon our return; failing to rehearse didn't work – we were made to do it unprepared.
After three woeful speeches, something strange happened. In recounting it to other people today, it feels about as sophisticated as Thomas the Tank Engine achieving his dreams by pumping out “I know I can” – but this is the way it happened, so this is the way I’ll tell it.
Something inside me said, “The only reason you speak badly is because you fear speaking badly. But the reverse is also true. If you expect to speak well – you will.”
Spurred on by this mysterious message, for the next three days, I practiced sounding courageous with my unbroken voice, and practiced looking confident in front of my mum’s full-length mirror until I was out of time.
Speech day arrived.
I opened my mouth, made a joke and waited for the groans. A few people laughed. I was staggered. I’d never told a joke that someone had laughed at before in my life. My confidence grew.
Was my strategy working? Spontaneously, my voice started incorporating what I’d practiced. I noticed the audience smiling and listening attentively. That was a new experience!
This became like a virtuous upward spiral. Every time I noticed the connection with the audience deepen, my confidence in turn would go up, till by the end, the teacher could not believe that I was the same timid 11-year old.
One year later, despite overwhelming shyness, I had just spoken in front of 500 of my peers. In a state of post-speech calm, I heard with disbelief the words “Winner of the speech competition: Daniel Batten!”
The sequence of strategies I practiced back in 1982, however formative, had worked.
Nothing much had changed on the outside. I didn't have any more skills as a speaker. I hadn't learnt delivery. I hadn't learnt how to structure a compelling talk. That stuff is all the UI, important, but not as important as optimizing the underlying code. What I'd done all those years ago was to change a bit of internal coding architecture, so that I could operate without constraints.
Decades later, this would inform how I coached leaders, CEOs and founders of technology companies, and how I coached myself. Yes, we do a bit of work on the UI. But the most effective and immediate work is done refactoring our inner algorithms.
~~~
Question:
Where have you assumed you have a fixed potential based on previous experiences, whereas a small internal tweak in your internal coding (a tweak to a mindset, pattern of belief or intention for example) could allow you to experience new experiences?